Do you notice when negative, self-destructive thoughts creep into your mind? Do you discourage yourself with negative self-talk? These negative, self-destructive thoughts can rob you of a happy and fulfilling life if you don’t control them.
Are you entertaining these thoughts sometimes? Take a look at some examples below, along with some suggestions on how to overcome them.
No one understands me. If you feel this way, share your thoughts with the right people around you. Also, try to cultivate a circle of like-minded people with whom you can share your thoughts. This will help you gain confidence in your ability to express yourself.
I don’t have enough time to “———————” (lose weight, practice my hobbies, go after my dreams, write a book, etc..). Start working to create a healthy balance in your life. Create time each day to do the things that make you happy. Fit your favorite activities into your very busy day. Start small by scheduling 15 minutes every day for yourself. When you practice this consistently, you will find yourself making time for the things that matter to you.
I don’t deserve to have a happy life. Perhaps the choices you have made in the past have caused you considerable psychological pain. You have been beating yourself up emotionally over those decisions. However, if you have identified them as poor choices, you have learned not to repeat them.
Congratulate yourself for learning from those mistakes. You have gained new knowledge to use from this day forward.
Confront those thoughts with “I deserve to have a happy life. I have learned from my mistakes.”
Things never seem to work out for me. This is a general statement about how you feel about yourself. It sends a message.”I must not be doing something right. Something is wrong with me.”
In reality, you likely do many things well. Spend some time identifying what those things are. Also, identify the things that are going well. Take time to write them down. You may be focusing on what is not working well and barely noticing the things that are going well.
If I can’t do it perfectly, then I am not doing it at all. You want to do everything excellently; that’s understandable. But how will you try anything new if it has to be perfect? Thinking this way will prevent you from venturing outside your comfort zone.
Replace those thoughts with “If at first, I don’t succeed. I will keep trying till I do.”
Allow yourself to try new things, make mistakes, and learn as you grow.
I am afraid to do the things I want to do. What are you specifically afraid of? It could be embarrassment, failure, or what others will think. The key is that, even though you feel fear, you must do the thing you want to do anyway; otherwise, you will never know what positive things could happen as a result of you following your dreams.
When negative thoughts begin to invade your life, replace them with positive thoughts.